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Sex and the City
Director: Michael Patrick King
Screenplay: Michael Patrick King
Starring: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall
If you just can’t get enough of Carrie and the gals, HBO is releasing the “extended version” of the 2008 film.
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TRON
Director: Steven Lisberger
Screenplay: Steven Lisberger
Starring: Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner
Jeff Bridges abandons his family to rule a video game land, which is not unlike the story of many millennial fathers we know but without all the cool lights, motorcycles and action.
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Traders
Director: Rachael Moriarty, Peter Murphy
Screenplay: Rachael Moriarty, Peter Murphy
Starring: Killian Scott, John Bradley, Nika McGuigan
In this Deep Web approximation of the Thunderdome, two men enter with all their assets in a green duffel bag and only one exits in a winner-take-all-battle to the death. This is Trading (apparently).
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A Monster Calls
Director: J.A. Bayona
Screenplay: Patrick Ness
Starring: Lewis MacDougall, Sigourney Weaver
The monster in this movie is kind of like a more brutal Giving Tree. While helping the young protagonist cope with his mother’s terminal illness, it also gives a beat down to schoolyard bullies.
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Hidden Figures
Director: Theodore Melfi
Screenplay: Allison Schroeder, Theodore Melfi
Starring: Taraji P. Henson, Octavia Spencer
This film commits to celluloid the untold story of a team of African-American women mathematicians who played vital role in NASA during the beginning of the space program.
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La La Land
Director: Damien Chazelle
Screenplay: Damien Chazelle
Starring: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone
People talked a lot of trash on La La Land because it wasn’t Moonlight but, man, not everything needs to be Moonlight. Sometimes you just want to watch some white people dancing and let’s be real—Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone are pure magic, y’all.
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Assassin’s Creed
Director: Jim Kurzel
Screenplay: Michael Lesslie, Adam Cooper
Starring: Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons
It doesn’t matter how many big name actors you can squeeze in, video game movies are always trash. With the exception of the first Mortal Kombat movie and the Street Fighter movie, of course.
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Why Him?
Director: John Hamburg
Screenplay: John Hamburg
Starring: Zoey Deutch, James Franco
The better question is: why not him?
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The Amityville Horror
Director: Andrew Douglas
Screenplay: Scott Kosar
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George
There’ve been just about 14 Amityville Horror adaptations and really only the first, 1979 version truly captured the terror put forth in the original novel. Though much of the account has been disputed, it’s still pretty terrifying nightmare fuel.
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Austin Powers: the Spy Who Shagged Me
Director: Jay Roach
Screenplay: Mike Meyers
Starring: Mike Meyers, Heather Graham
For all his deficiencies, Mike Meyers knows how to create cinematic cultural landmarks. We don’t want to live in a world without “Shagadelic” or “Yeah, Baby!”
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Fried Green Tomatoes
Director: Jon Avnet
Screenplay: Fannie Flagg
Starring: Kathy Bates, Jessica Tandy
Damn, remember when the train rips off Buddy’s arm and then they hold a funeral for the arm? The South is weird, man.
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Halloween: Resurrection
Director: Rick Rosenthal
Screenplay: Larry Brand
Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Busta Rhymes
Who’s your favorite Michael Meyers? The one who was in Wayne’s World or the one who kills Busta Rhymes? Also, Jamie Lee Curtis returns to the franchise which kick started her whole career, launching her from scream queen to megastar to where-are-they-now.
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Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Director: Guillermo del Toro
Screenplay: Guillermo del Toro
Starring: Ron Perlman, Selma Blair
With the Hellboy series, Guillermo Del Toro proved that little-known comic book adaptations could be:
- Awesome
- Financially worthwhile
They’re rebooting the franchise with new actors and a director who’s, so far, done nothing of note. We don’t have such high hopes for that one.
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How High
Director: Jesse Dylan
Screenplay: Dustin Lee Abraham
Starring: Method Man, Redman
What happened to stoner comedies? With it being increasingly legal and/or decriminalized, you’d think there’d be a deluge of stoner films right now. We suppose it’s just not as funny or as subversive when everybody’s doing it. Anyway, this one has its moments.
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The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Director: Garth Jennings
Screenplay: Douglas Adams
Starring: Martin Freeman, Yasiin Bey
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is one of the most beloved books for people who skew socially awkward (and other people too, probably). This adaptation hit the mark because Douglas Adams (the book’s author) signed on to write the script. Also, Mos Def.
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Maximum Overdrive
Director: Stephen King
Screenplay: Stephen King
Starring: Emilio Estevez, Pat Hingle
Stephen King should stick to what he does best: making people fear inanimate objects and clowns. His first (and last) time in the director’s chair is good for a few laughs but that’s about it.
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Scarface
Director: Brian De Palma
Screenplay: Oliver Stone
Starring: Al Pacino, Michelle Pfeiffer
The film that inspired a legion of hip-hop albums and a myriad of ways for middle class white kids to decorate their dorm rooms while moving small amounts of pot. It’s still a classic, though, despite the dicey legacy.
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Scent of a Woman
Director: Martin Brest
Screenplay: Bo Goldman
Starring: Al Pacino, Chris O’Donnell
The title of this movie is kind of gross when you think about it, right?
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Vice Principals: Season 2
Created by: Jody Hill, Danny McBride
Starring: Danny McBride, Walton Goggins
Season one ended with a murder and now Danny McBride’s Neal Gamby is trying to figure out who tried to off him in this seriously strange dark comedy series.
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The Deuce: Series Premier
Created by: George Pelecanos, David Simon
Starring: James Franco, Maggie Gyllenhaal
James Franco cannot get enough of true-crime porn stories having just released King Cobra about a murder in the world of gay porn. Now, he’s playing a pair of small-time Mafioso twins beginning to dip their toes into smut in 70s New York City. Done by the guy who brought us The Wire so it must be good.
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